I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
