I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize