How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize