Pappa wants mamma naked
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Randomize
