And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
