I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
We're too hungover to prance.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
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