I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I am available for nakedness
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