Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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