Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize