Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
