i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
