i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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