Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Barsexuality is the new black.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize
