Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
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