We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
