just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize