I need help removing her.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize
