i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
please come you make the beer taste better
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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