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thus making me awesome and them whores
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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