Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Randomize
