you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Randomize