upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
We talked him into tasing himself.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
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