all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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