Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
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