There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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