Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
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get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
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