yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
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