Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
honey bunches of taint.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I need to calm my uterus...
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
