matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
