Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
