Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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