good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
