Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
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Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
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He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me