We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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