i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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