Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize