I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
