420 ftw
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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