is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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