I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
