Texts From Last Night

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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.

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  (732): When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest. http://tfl.nu/kqsj
  Replies (29) Good night (594) Bad night (5156)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience

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  (248): so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience http://tfl.nu/77ps
  Replies (16) Good night (728) Bad night (4184)
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  (650): View more from California

  Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.

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  (650): Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart. http://tfl.nu/8dw8
  Replies (18) Good night (5290) Bad night (1199)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?

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  (412): Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something? http://tfl.nu/z60e
  Replies (2) Good night (2424) Bad night (735)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.

  (936): View more from Texas

  As you should.

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  (210): Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis. (936): As you should. http://tfl.nu/jcwt
  Replies (3) Good night (716) Bad night (967)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof

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  (614): Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof http://tfl.nu/erp7
  Replies (13) Good night (710) Bad night (2376)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.

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  (970): I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome. http://tfl.nu/hol9
  Replies (6) Good night (2444) Bad night (726)
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.

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  (952): He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy. http://tfl.nu/1isp
  Replies (5) Good night (927) Bad night (545)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun

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  (630): All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun http://tfl.nu/y2l0
  Replies (6) Good night (2006) Bad night (426)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.

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  (509): This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats. http://tfl.nu/orv1
  Replies (4) Good night (619) Bad night (293)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  was it you?

  (802): View more from Vermont

  ...yes

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  (802): just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store (203): was it you? (802): ...yes http://tfl.nu/br4h
  Replies (7) Good night (2312) Bad night (358)
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  (562): View more from California

  I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.

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  (562): I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked. http://tfl.nu/1vom
  Replies (9) Good night (651) Bad night (246)
• Favorite

  (435): View more from Utah

  Sex in the moonbounce later?

  (801): View more from Utah

  This is why I love you.

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  (435): Sex in the moonbounce later? (801): This is why I love you. http://tfl.nu/fq99
  Replies (2) Good night (756) Bad night (107)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?

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  (818): Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!? http://tfl.nu/7lwx
  Replies (8) Good night (422) Bad night (222)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.

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  (214): On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded. http://tfl.nu/gjfr
  Replies (2) Good night (360) Bad night (193)

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