My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
