? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
