I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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