Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
She's the barista slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Randomize