I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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