Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
