It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
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