so that wasnt chicken after all
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
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