If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Randomize
