All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize